BIRTHDAY WARRIORS CATS
by Ravenwing101
Summary: HAPPY B DAY TO ALL WARRIORS, btw, TALLSTAR IS OLD, he's like 98 or something
1. Chapter 1 Tallstar

**Tallstar's Birthday**

"TALLSTAR!"Mudclaw screamed  
"WHAT, IM SLEEPING!"Tallstar croaked  
"YOU CAN SLEEP WHEN YOUR DEAD, COME OUT HERE."Mudclaw demanded  
Tallstar cursed at Mudclaw and slowly walked out of his den.  
"SURPRISE!"The clan yelled. "HAPPY 98th BIRTHDAY!"|  
"IM FLIPPIN 30!"Tallstar snapped.  
"Are you sure?"Onewhisker asked.  
"YOU'RE SO MEAN, MUDCLAW. ONEWHISKER, SINCE YOU'RE NOT MEAN, YOURE NEW DEPUTY!"

**That's the REAL reason why Onewhisker became deputy**

"Here is your cake, make a wish and blow out the candles."Barkface said.  
"WISH FOR A NEW SKATEBOARD FOR MMEEE !Shrewclaw commanded.  
Tallstar hesitated but closed his old eyes and blew.  
"What did you wish for?" Diseasekit asked.  
"TO HAVE ONE DAY WITHOUT YOU ANNOYING BRATS!"Tallstar said.  
"Awww, we know you're just being sarcastic." Dumbkit said, stupidly.  
The clan hugged Tallstar until he became purple.

**That concluses it, Tallstar's birthday is the worst days of his life.**


	2. Chapter 2 Firestar

Firestar woke up from a heavy slumber, only to remember that it was his birthday! Firestar raced out of his den and found Cloudtail running around, his head exploding everywhere.

"UP, UP AND AWAY, OH SHOOT THE SUN AHHHHHHHHH!"The kits screamed while being on balloons.

"SAVE MY KITS!"Ferncloud demanded, yelling at dead rocks.

"OH NO, ITS ASHFUR, EVERYONE HEAD TO THE BOMB SHELTER DENS!"Squirrelflight sang.

"ITS A UGLY, DROWLING DOG!"Longtail warned, "Wait that's just Brightheart."

Purdy took Jayfeather's mate, the stick, and ran in circles while playing the maracas. Jayfeather turned red in anger. "JAYFEATHER SMASH!" Jayfeather accidentally stepped on a mine bomb that Daisy put in case of badgers , THE WHOLE FOREST EXPLODED.

"WORST BIRTHDAY EVER!"Firestar growled.

"I know right." Starclan Tallstar agreed.


	3. Chapter 3 Blazerkitty

"GAYFEATHER!" Lionblaze called, he took Jayfeather's scruff and pulled him into safety.  
"WTF LIONBLAZE!" Jayfeather said, "AND ITS **JAY**feather not Gayfeather!"  
"I was saving your pelt! Today's May.30!" Lionblaze said.  
"So?" Jayfeather asked.  
"IT'S BLAZERKITTY'S BIRTHDAY!"  
"So?" Jayfeather repeated.  
"Don't you remember last year?" Lionblaze asked, "SHE PUT BOMBS IN THE FRESH-KILL! i STILL CAN'T GET THAT TASTE OUT OF MY MOUTH! Last, last year was the worst, SHE BLEW UP STARCLAN!"

**Just outside...**

Blazerkitty was walking. "Gayfeather? Lionbut? Where are you? It's my birthday, please don't ignore me."  
Uglykit walked up to her.  
_NO, UGLYKIT IS TOO UGLY ENOUGH, THE POOR NEWBORN CAN'T TAKE ANYMORE UGLY BOMBS!_Lionblaze thought.  
"What's wrong?" Uglykit asked.  
"Everyone is hiding from me, is it because they don't like me?" Blaze asked, "AM I UGLY?! I CAN'T BE AS UGLY AS UGLYKIT!"  
"Hey!" Uglykit said.  
"NO ONE LIKES ME WAHHHHHHHHHH." Blaze said. (Blaze never crys btw.)  
Thunderclan felt sad and came out from hiding, "Sorry Blaze."  
"Now that we know you don't have bombs, let party!" Stupidkit annouced.  
"Who said I don't have bombs?" Blazerkitty asked.

The forest exploded, though Blazerkitty was the only one wearing anti-bomb armor.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BLAZE,

btw, I NEED _DUMB,_ **RANDOM** WARRIOR CAT NAMES LIKE STUPIDKIT AND UGLYKIT, SORRY IF I DON'T USE THEM ALL.


	4. Chapter 5 Hollyleaf

**Hollyleaf's birthday**

"ITS MY BIRTHDAY" Hollyleaf screamed, "YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS!"

Every cat moaned.

"IM LEADER FOR A DAY!"

"You're going to allow this?" Squirrelflight asked Bramblestar.

"She kept lecturing me about why she should. I couldn't take it, sorry." Bramblestar apologized. "The lecture lasted two moons."

"AS LEADER!" Holly**star **announced, " EVERYONE WILL ACTUALLY **READ **THE WARRIOR CODE."

"NOOOOO!" Idiotbrain shouted.

"How am I going to read?" Jayfeather asked, "No one wrote the code down, I'm surprised anyone actually remembered the code."

"SHAT UP SMARTYPANTS!"Idiotbrain said.

Hollystar handed out huge pamphlets, "I wrote them down in 63 books."

"Your handwriting sucks." Rainbowkit said.

"For that, YOU WRITE A TEXTBOOK ABOUT HOW AWESOME I AM!" Hollyleaf said.

"FFFFFUUUUUU!"Rainbowkit cursed.

"Wait, what kind of codes are these?" Dungfoot asked, "Code seven, Hollyleaf is **cat**alious? Code eight, Hollyleaf puts the purr in **purr**fect. Hollyleaf loves to hollyleaf in the holly of leaves?! THAT ONE DOESNT EVEN MAKE ANY SENSE!"

"MWAHHHHH!" Hollystar laughed.

Hollyleaf lectured everyone until they're brain exploded out of dumbness.

Poor Thunderclan... Just wait til next year, Hollyleaf will lecture Riverclan until Mistystar she gives a compliment Hollyleaf and her "Hollyleaf awesomeness."


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter uhh, I forgot...

"It's my birthday!" Tigerstar cheered, "Now who got my cake?"

"No one." Firestar said.

"Why not?"

"oh, I don't know, BECAUSE U TRIED TO KILL US ALL!?" The clans roared.

"But it's my birthday, and birthday rules say...

1- EVERYONE HERE IS A POODLE, IF YOU DONT LIKE POODLES, TOO BAD!

2- IF ITS UR BIRTHDAY, EVERYONE WILL DO EVERYTHING U SAY! NO VIOLENCE.

3- IF SOMEONE GETS POOPED ON, BLAME IT ON ASHFUR

" Tigerstar said.

"Mouse dung, he is right!" Sandstorm said, "We have to do whatever he says, you know what this means."

"Blame it on Ashfur?" Lionblaze suggested.

"Fuuuu!" Ashfur cursed.

"SHAT UP!" Tigerstar screamed, "For my birthday, I want a cake, and some pretty ponies!"

"Ponies?" Firestar asked.

"Don't be a hater, also everyone will dress up in a tutu."

"NOOOOO!" The clan said.

"YAY!" Leafpool cheered.

"Now I know why Scourge wanted to kill you." Firestar said.

"TEA PARTY!" Tigerstar spilled hot tea on everyone. "Wait... This isn't tea..."

Cloudtail checked the tea package, "ITS TOILET WATER!"

Everyone in the forest threw up, except for Tigerstar, who just laughed.

"Ima go kill Bluestar now, BYE!" Tigerstar said.

"I...HATE...HIM!" Firestar said, dying.

"The worst part is... he took my wallet." Whitestorm choked.

Poor warriors, Tigerstar had the best birthday, for him that is.


End file.
